Eight Dates: Essential Conversations For A Lifetime Of Love

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Would you be interested if I told you that eight dates would forever change your relationship? Or that, if you and your partner had these eight life-changing conversations, you would significantly strengthen and deepen your love? Whether you think your relationship is far from perfect or the most secure partnership in the world, you can still engage in these life-changing conversations. Growth & Spirituality - if you’re religious, talk about that here. Otherwise, construct sacred rituals with each other.

His high prediction rate is not a testament to the inevitably of failure, but rather to his understanding of what makes a relationship work and not work. And, while it’s helpful to know the four main reasons relationships fail, it’s equally critical to understand what makes them succeed. I'm sure there are a lot of similar books around, and while I can't Studies have shown that dual-career couples with young children spend only 10% of their evenings together, with most of that time spent discussing errands. (In other words, they have to work extra hard to keep that romantic spark alive…) I'm sure there are a lot of similar books around, and while I can't compare this one to them, what I can say is that I loved the concept of these dates. It helped us center our conversations around a particular topic in a particular setting, while letting us apply our own modifications that suited our relationship and our personalities. Readers who are interested in protecting and enhancing their marriage and partnership would likely enjoy Eight Dates. Who would not enjoy this book?Eight Dates and The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work By John Gottman 2 Books Collection Set by John M. Gottman – eBook Details It’s important for couples to share their dreams with each other. Keeping your dreams from your partner leads to bitterness, resentment, loss of passion and desire, and distance.

Vulnerable Leadership: 6 Tips on Being Vulnerable as a Leader from Dare to Lead Facilitator Kathy Bell-Tonic This book walks couples through eight conversation-based dates to help them strengthen their connection and discover new things about each other. Because this is for sure: Happily ever after doesn’t mean there are no challenges or conflict. You can’t be in a relationship and not have conflict. Not if you’re doing it right.” As we mentioned above, the largest study of love on the planet, with 70,000 people in 24 countries, found that in all great relationships, kissing passionately for no reason at all was one universal key to a great sex life.”First the run of the motor. Then pop. Pause. Pop. Pause. Pop. Pop. Pop. In between a steady stream of pops, I could just barely make out the sound of his voice on a phone call. The adoption of the Gregorian calendar occurred slowly over a period of centuries, and despite many proposals to further reform the calendar, the Gregorian Calendar still prevails as the most commonly used dating system worldwide. Holidays A good idea for this date is to go to one of your go-to spots or activities, as it represents the time and commitment you’ve made to each other. I think this book is an amazing way to date intentionally. One of my friends who I showed the book to said the book was just like couples therapy, which they were going through at the time with their partner. This book is going to be lengthy and deep like therapy - it takes weeks and months to finish the book together, and each of the 8 topics can be hours of conversation.

I doubt your idea of a fun date night is discussing the things you fight about or examining why you’re a saver or a spender. We rarely set aside time in our busy lives to discuss life’s hardest topics. One of the greatest myths about happy relationships is that they don’t experience any conflict. Conflict is going to arise when two people try to join their lives together. Rather than viewing conflict as a negative thing, it can be incredibly useful for you to grow as a couple. For this date, you need to be willing to be brave, take off your armor, and discuss the differences between you. Ultimately, it will help you identify areas of conflict and how to work through them more effectively. What we did:The date called for us to make a physical tribute to the other person. We decided to make a photo collage on Mint to hang in our bedroom. We journeyed to the past as we went through old vacation photos, Snapchat screenshots, and silly videos. After finishing the collage, we answered questions about rituals of connection and life goals.

The dates were designed by John and Julie Gottman, along with their co-authors Doug and Rachel Abrams. John has spent the last four decades studying thousands of couples to understand what makes some relationships thrive and others fail. Julie is an award-winning clinical psychologist who’s worked with thousands of individuals and couples. They’re leaders in the world of love and relationships. World-renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction, John Gottman, Ph.D., has conducted 40 years of breakthrough research with thousands of couples. His work on marriage and parenting has earned him numerous major awards, including four National Institute of Mental Health Research Scientist Awards. He is the author or coauthor of more than 40 books, including the bestselling The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work; What Makes Love Last; The Relationship Cure; Why Marriages Succeed or Fail; and Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child. Dr. Gottman’s media appearances include Good Morning America, Today, CBS Morning News, and Oprah, as well articles in the New York Times, Ladies Home Journal, Redbook, Glamour, Woman’s Day, People, Self, Reader’s Digest, and Psychology Today. Cofounder of the Gottman Institute with his wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, John was also the Executive Director of the Relationship Research Institute. He is Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of Washington, where he founded "The Love Lab" at which much of his research on couples’ interactions was conducted. He lives in Seattle. Eight Dates is a book on marriage and relationships that gets you and your partner to read, think, and then go on a date together. The dates each have a theme and involve answering questions from the book to develop a greater understanding of each other, increase health and vitality in your relationship, and grow closer in the process. Topics covered in this book include: What we did:Scott cooked a delicious edamame pasta, then we ventured out to a local coffee shop to share a vanilla rooibos tea, worksheets in tow. The exercise asked us to review 25 common conflicts — like differences in punctuality, independence, and ambition — and circle the ones relevant to our relationship, then compare and discuss. A]n instant hit… If you’ve been married forever and think this book isn’t for you, (dates??), think again.”—Oprah.com

What we learned:The exercise led to a great insight about how we approach keeping the house clean. I tend to let the house turn into a disaster zone over several days, and then clean up all at once, during a podcast-fueled spree. Scott explained that when I let the house get messy, he feels like I’m saying that I think my time is more valuable than his. I understood his perspective and committed to taking the time to tidy up daily, so that Scott doesn’t have to forge a path to the bathroom through piles of shoes and books. Certain holidays such as New Year's Day are referred to as "fixed holidays," since they fall on the same date every year. Others, such as the birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr., don't have a fixed date, because they occur on a "floating Monday"; in this particular case, the holiday occurs on the third Monday of January. Another widely observed holiday in the U.S., Thanksgiving, occurs on a "floating Thursday," the fourth Thursday In November, hence the dates of these holidays vary by year. Book Genre: Communication, Language, Love, Marriage, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Psychology, Relationships, Romance, Self Help, UnfinishedDoctors John and Julie Gottman have spent over three decades studying the habits of 3000 couples. Within 10 minutes of meeting a couple, they can predict who will stay happily together or who will split up, with 94% accuracy. Based on their findings on the ingredients to a happy, lasting love life, they have now created an easy series of eight dates, spanning: There is SO MUCH interesting info in this book! I know not everyone is going to froth at the mouth over learning how couples interact with each other, but I seriously couldn’t get enough. It’s all so interesting to me, discovering what is “normal” and what actually creates a lasting connection, especially when it doesn’t necessarily match up with what I expected. Some of my favorite insights: Full Book Name: Eight Dates and The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work By John Gottman 2 Books Collection Set Happily Ever After is not by chance - it's By Choice. John and Julie Gottman are cofounders of the Gottman Institute, bestselling authors, and award-winning researchers. Together, they have a deep understanding of what makes relationships work. Now, they bring that lifetime's worth of knowledge, research, and wisdom to bear in Eight Dates, a program of how, why, and when to have eight basic conversations with your partner that can result in a lifetime of love. Eight Dates is written for any serious couple, and its dates are structured around the concepts of trust, dealing with conflict, sex and intimacy, having fun, work and money, children, and more. There are questionnaires, innovative exercises, real-life case studies, and skills to master. Because to make love truly last, each of you have to be involved and active. Seriously, why not go on these dates? Start thinking about some of the themes and “Before the date” questions and comment below.